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| You know those days where you wake up and think, "Wow I need a fresh start." Well I've been feeling that for a long while. So I decided to start anew. I'm going to change my major and move. I just can't stand going to LCC, I hate living at home so I'm going to do something about it. I don't know where I am going to go but I'll figure it out. It's exciting just thinking about it. One day I will leave this crappy town and never come back.
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| 9/02
I passed out today. I was walking back to my car after I got some lunch. I felt a bit dizzy and next thing I knew I woke up laying on the street. My vision was kind of blurry when I woke up. I stumbled to my feet and someone helped me up. They asked me if I was OK and if I would need medical attention. I told them I'm probably fine, was probably just a fluke. I need to back to work. I can get checked out later. So then I go to look at my watch and realize it's gone. So are my car keys, my cellphone and my wallet. Who robs an unconscious guy!?
I'm still feeling a bit dizzy, So I figure I probably should get checked out. I'm pretty sure I can make it to the hospital. I think it's about 3 blocks. So I start walking there, every step I take I feel a bit closer to blacking out. I can't give up though, people in this city only watch their own backs. Counting on kindness is too optimistic for my taste. So I keep walking. I am about one block away when I hear a gruff voice, "Give me your wallet!" He's got a blade to my throat. I tell him I don't have one on me, I got robbed earlier. He digs the knife deeper and I can feel a bit of blood on my neck. I start to feel light headed as he tells me I have one last chance. I black out.
I wake up and I'm in a bed in a white room. I see a figure next to me but I cant really make it out. It starts to talk to me and it tells me, "Listen, you're going to be alright." The only thing I say is, "Are you God?" Then the figure says, "What? No you're not dead. I'm Doctor Jones, I found you on my way in. You were laying on the street, bleeding from your head. Apparently you passed out and hit your head on the curb." I touch my throat and it feels a bit scratched up but doesn't feel like it was slit. I ask him why I passed out twice in a day. He tells me he needs to run some tests before he can give me a definitive answer. I spend the next week in that room just waiting. I can't even remember how many tests I had to go through. A few people visited me, including my boss. He kind of laughed as he told me he was about to fire me for not coming back after lunch, until he heard what happened. I felt that it was pretty messed up for him to be laughing about this right now.
When I asked for a pizza instead of the hospital food the first night the nurse laughed until she realized I was serious. She kind of gave me this smirk smile and walked away. For dinner all I got was a Jello cup. I asked a nurse why I got a Jello cup. At first she said, " Mr. Johnson, according to your bedside chart you have dietary restrictions." Great Jello it is. Go figure I passed out, get robbed, stumble to the hospital, get robbed again and they give me Jello for dinner. I asked her why I can only eat Jello. She tells me it is because the doctor might be afraid of certain foods affecting the tests. I tell her that seems like a load of crap. She gives me pretty much the same exact smirk smile and I'm starting to wonder if they train all the nurses on that. Then I apologize and tell her, "Sorry, It's just when I pass out and get mugged twice and get only Jello for dinner I can be a bit cranky." She storms off.
The doctors still don't know why I passed out at the end of the week. I'm told it's unsafe to let me out just yet. I feel almost like a prisoner. I had my friends call my bank to cancel my cards. Apparently whoever robbed me added almost 2,500$ to my bill. The bank doesn't believe my friends when they tell them what happened. They don't believe me when I tell them what happened. I'm so pissed I just start yelling and next thing I know I'm being held down and injected with something.
I wake up to find security in my room. Dr. Jones asks me if I feel alright. I laugh and then tell him that's a stupid question to ask at this point. To my surprise he smiles and chuckles. Then he says, "Yeah, guess it is huh?" Finally a decent person in this place. He tells me the nurses on staff said I had a mental breakdown and needed to be calmed down. I tell him I just lost 2,500$ and was pretty pissed. He then said, "Wait till you see my bill!" I know, it could not be more cliche. But it did cheer me up. He told me he'd be back to check on me. Right before he leaves the room I ask him when I will be able to go home. I can see his smile drop as he tells me he still isn't sure.
To be continued...(I gotta get up at 6am man!)
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| My new journals will just be creative writing entry's fyi. Mostly fiction based on real life events...
8/21
So I met this guy at a business conference today. I can't remember his name but he had really greasy hair. It looked like he just used a whole tube of gel. Anyways he kept on rubbing his fingers through his hair about every 5 minutes and then wiping them on the table. It was really gross. I don't even remember what the speaker said. It was enthralling in the sense that a fat women in a bikini is enthralling, like you want to look away but you can't. He kept on talking with this fake New York accent that was pretty stereotypical. Now that I think of it he kind of was a walking stereotype. I can't believe all I can remember is just some pasty guy that acted like he was from New York.
8/22
So we got assigned partners today for a workshop and I got partnered with the girl from Legally Blonde. Of course I wasn't happy but I figured it's only a workshop and she couldn't possibly screw me that bad. She did though. First thing she say's when we get paired up and start to work is, "Do you think the instructor is Japanese or Asian?" I am staring at her in complete shock when I realize we are partners and she might have just destroyed my chance of passing this course. Luckily for the both of us our instructor, who was Korean by the way, did not hear her. I asked the instructor if there was any possibility of me changing partners due to the fact that I am working with a bimbo and he kind of held back a laugh as he told me to get back to work.
8/28
Somehow that "bimbo" managed to get hired into my office. So today I get to be the one to train her. So I am waiting at the front door for her to arrive and she drives up, grabs her purse, and gets out of her car. There is a freaking dog in her purse. I camly tell her that animals are not allowed in the office, we don't even have fish, and she throws a fit. She says, "I can't leave Tinks at home! He might like get eaten or something!" At this point I just want to pack up my desk and quit because I cannot work with this but I decide to be patient. I tell her i'll talk to the boss. So I tell her to wait a few minutes outside while I walk in. I just kill a few minutes by reading the paper. Then I come back outside and tell her that the boss agreed with my decision and "Tinks" has to go. So she is all upset and calls a friend to pick the dog up.
At this point we are not even introduced yet, So I say, "By the way I'm Greg." She looks at me and delivers a surprisingly eloquent "aghh." So I start to tell her about the procedures and policies of the office and I can tell she is not paying attention so at this point I am fed up and I am pretty sure she got her college degree at some drive through community college in Vegas. So I just leave her in the room and tell her that I'll be back shortly. Then I start getting caught up on the work that I was actually hired to do. About an hour later she storms out asking for the boss. When she tells him what I did he is furious and probaly about to write me up until her phone rings. In the middle of all of this she decides to answer her phone and when the boss tells her personal calls are not permitted on the clock she puts her hand on the phone and says. "Do you mind?" He was so taken aback that there actually was this near moment of silence and peace before he erupted like Vesuvius and fired her.
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So I'm at work eating dinner with a really pretty girl that was so pretty that I was suprised she actually sat with me, not because i have low self esteem because the pretty girls at work are usually stuck up, and we were talking while I was eating lobster. Part way through the conversation I look at my lobster and I say ,"wow i think i just found its brains." good call buddy. So then shes a little grossed out but still wants to talk to me. After that we talk about working different events at the Uclub (where i work) and I bring up how I would like to work the haunted house so i can scare the crap out of little kids. then she says and I quote "um that's not normal." And the finishing touches to my sweet dinner skills have to be when i was cracking open the shell of the lobster, talking about how powerful lobster claws are and then saying "do you know it only takes 20 pounds of force to break a human kneecap?" which of course she was kind of freaked out so I told her I follow martial arts and that actually seemed to work. (because martial arts are all about breaking bones huh?" so yeah.
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| Still missing my dad
Still failing at being like Christ
Still trying to love myself when I hate what I see in the mirror
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